| 10. |
I
think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing
geek in "Deliverance.") |
| 9. |
There’s
a slight difference in our ages. (I don’t want to do my dad.) |
| 8. |
I’m
not attracted to you in "that" way. (You are the ugliest
dork I’ve ever laid eyes on.) |
| 7. |
My
life is too complicated right now. (I don’t want you spending
the night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other
guys I’m seeing.) |
| 6. |
I’ve
got a boyfriend. (I prefer my male cat and a half-gallon of
Ben and Jerry’s.) |
| 5. |
I
don’t date men where I work. (I wouldn’t date you if you were
in the same "solar system," much less the same building.) |
| 4. |
It’s
not you, it’s me. (It’s you.) |
| 3. |
I’m
concentrating on my career. (Even something as boring and unfulfilling
as my job is better than dating you.) |
| 2. |
I’m
celibate. (I’ve sworn off only the men like you.) |
| 1. |
Let’s
be friends. (I want you to stay around so I can tell you in
excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have
sex with. It’s the male perspective thing.) |